(For anyone who struggles with public speaking)
Me: I'm feeling anxious about a talk I'm about to give. I've come so far with my fear of public speaking, but this is a lot of people. I keep preparing and preparing...I’m overpreparing. I don't want to have to look at my notes or slides. I have too much on the slides. I don't even like slides...everyone looking at a wall - no human interaction. What I’d really like to do is stand there and talk out of my head, but I'm afraid I might freeze and get brain fog. Soul: Why are people coming? Me: To get information for themselves, their families, clients or patients. Soul: Do you think what you're talking about is useful to them? Me: I do,…I really do. Soul: So then, is this a performance, or is this you giving something that no one else can at this time or place? Me: It’s me giving. Soul: So are people coming to check you out, to judge you and tally the number of times you say "Um…," or are they coming because they think you have information that they might need? Me: That last one. I'm worried they might ask questions I won't be able to answer. Soul: Don't be defensive, and don't pretend to know something you don't. Tell them you don't know. They'll trust you more and have more confidence in what you do know. Before you start - breathe and remember you're there as a conduit of information and they're there because they have a need. Feel lucky you have something to bring to the universal table.....Just bring it... This isn't about you. This is bigger than you. Courtney A. Brown
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(For anyone who, like myself, has struggled with believing they know what's right for others.)
There was a time, I thought that to help someone at a crossroads in their life, I had to give them a detailed map, program their GPS, or tell them exactly where to go - which way to turn. Then there was a time, I'd tried to hold back, bite my lip, and tell myself it was none of my business, BUT ...if they asked me, I'd jump right in with my sage advice. There was a time, I didn't say a thing, but was annoyed when they made a sh*ty decision. Of course, I'd never admit I was annoyed...it was just that they were so clearly making a mistake...I didn't want to see them hurt...I didn't want to hear about it when...." Then there was the time, I'd thought, "Well, they're just going to have to live and learn,...that's right,... live and learn..." There was also the time, I didn't say a thing..."Not my problem," I'd think...before patting myself on the back for my excellent boundaries. All of those times were more about me than the person I thought I was helping - my need to control their outcome and my knack for judging. Now, when I hear about a decision someone is making or has made, that I don't necessarily agree with, the better part of me chimes in... "Who the hell are you to agree or disagree, or know what's right for them or anyone else...When did you walk down that exact same path, have their exact life experiences, wear those exact shoes...what makes you think your inner compass has anything to do with their journey...and what makes you think a seemingly bad idea in the short term, isn't an ideal decision for the long term." Someone once said to me, "The best way to help someone at their crossroads, is to listen well so they can hear themself." Actually I said that. I'd gotten tired of quoting others, and decided it was time I started quoting myself. It was about the time that I stopped questioning everyone else's inner voice, and started listening to my own. Courtney A Brown To send this note to a friend: |
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"Divine" references the soul, our collective souls and the mystery of life. ArchivesCategories
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